Anger Management; Issues,Techniques and Treatment

 “Anger Management techniques and treatment”

A general Overview;

“Anger Management is basically a Psycho-Therapeutic Technique to prevent the outburst of energy in the form of Anger”. It is to direct the energy (Which is uncontrollable) in the right direction so that benefits can be gained instead of one`s own loss of health, relationships and much more as one cannot see one`s self in the boiling water (Anger) it has to be cooled down to analyze oneself and the problem in order to direct anger in constructive way.

What is Anger?

The term “Anger” is a strong energy in the situations for instance, when you feel hurt, neglect, vulnerable or powerless etc. It is like a fire ball inside you that needs abrupt and quick expression of itself. It is up-to a person to express it in any way either constructive or destructive.

Is anger; Constructive or Destructive?

Well, it totally depends on a person to use it in either way as it is the common phenomena of human life.

 When a person uses it in destructive way, there are maximum chances that a person might hurt himself and the regret developed by it will never leave him.

As Mark Twain said;

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything which is poured on it.”

  On the contrary, when a person uses it in constructive way, for instance when he/she employs the technique of anger management upon himself/herself, the fire ball just changes its shape to everything that benefits a person and that technique when employed always works well.

Why a person becomes angry?

  Its answer lies in the magnificent theory of great psychologist and thinker Sigmund Freud. In his theory of Psychosexual development, he described three states of human Personality:

•  Id
• Ego
• Super Ego
  

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“Id” is an evil, primitive, instinctual force in human mind that needs quick gratification of its desires. For instance, eating, drinking, and all kinds of human needs.

“Super-ego” consists of moral principals and standards that a society follows and accepts.

“Ego” is a balancer between Id and Super-ego. It finds ways to Satisfy id needs keeping in view moral standards of Super-ego.

The point here is that, all the negative feelings like feeling of suicide, abuse, anger, depression, anxiety come when Ego fails to find ways to satisfy Id needs in balance with super-ego. So, societal conditions and moral standards whenever comes in conflict with id, there is anger, rage and depression. That’s the reason why a person often remain depressed, stressed angry and irritated.  

Signs/ Symptoms of Anger Issues in Human Beings:

  From Mild symptoms to Alarming symptoms;

        Mild Signs (Physical+ Psychological)

•  Anxiety sessions
• Shouting on people
• Desire to quit everything
• Desire to beat others
•  Verbal and physical harm to oneself and to others
• Hiding in isolation
•  Dropping things that are near
• Mild headache, increased blood pressure and heart rate.

         Alarming Symptoms (Physical+ Psychological)

•  Hyper-tensive sessions
• Insomnia and Sleeplessness
•  High pitch shouting and crying
• Abusive treatment
• Feeling of killing and destroying everything
•  Loss of control on mind
• Rampant suicidal thoughts
• Vulnerable to heart attacks and strokes
• Weakened Immunity
•  Severe headaches and Migraine    
  

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     Time for Hadith by Greatest Human on Earth Prophet Muhammad [P.B.U.H]

Abu Huraira reported Allah’s Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying:

“The strong-man is not one who wrestles well but the strong man is one who controls himself when he is in a fit of rage.”

How to tame Anger Management issues troubling Kids and Teens?

Kids and teens are most vulnerable to damages done by Anger that if not tamed on time would convert into rage and on that stage no one can control these destructive habits that have engulfed the esteem and Morals of these grown ups and is destructive both for the grown-up person and to whole society itself as they are the future of the world. So, if your kids and teens are showing signs of anger, do take the precautionary measures as;

                                                    “Precaution is better than treatment”  

Symptoms/Signs of Anger in kids and teens;

§  Verbal and Physical violence

§  Shouting and crying

§  Annoying at complex to even Normal situations

§  Always face headache

§  Showing Unacceptable social behavior (Smoking, Robbing)

§  Stop listening to Moral and ethical guidelines

§  Having Evil plans in mind always

§  Hurt themselves and others and torture parents

The signs that are presented above are the clear cut and alarming signs and if these are shown in your kids and teens, employ all your energy and attention to them as these are the signs that are about to become habits and it will destroy the whole society as they are the building blocks and future of the society.

Anger Management classes and Exercises for Kids;

Children are the blank slate on which you can write whatever you want. Also, they are most flexible. So, if your kids are facing with anger issues, Anger management techniques will be best applicable to them.

§  First of all, treat your children (Girls and Boys) equally so that cannot feel discrimination and if that’s the cause of their anger, it will remove.

§  Pay maximum attention to their kids as they are the attention seekers according to psychology and they need all of their parent`s attention. This will help to deal with their anger.

§   Engage them in healthy activities (Indoor and Outdoor) so that all their negative thought and energies will be released and directed towards positivity.

§  Employ Operant conditioning techniques, reward them with goodies and gifts if they show positive behavior. After rewarding them with goodies, they will release negative energy and then reinforce in them that positivity is always rewarded and anger is punished.

§  If anger is most rampant and it`s getting worse, Consult child psychologist quickly. They can professionally deal with kids and direct their negative energies towards positivity.

Anger Management techniques, Classes and exercises for Teens;

According to psychology, Adolescence age is most dangerous age for any person in which parents are to act smartly. They have to give them freedom as well as some limitations so that teens won`t develop anti-social behavior and become rebel and outrageous.

Anger in teens can be Constructive as well as Destructive;

·         If they are handled properly in conditions when they are outrageous and if they have positive social environment, they will employ their energies in positive direction. For instance, in study, in sports in pursuing their dreams. This is because, their living standards and parent`s guidance is supportive. So, Anger management techniques will more likely work on them and they will divert their anger towards positivity

·         On the contrary, if teens have bad social conditions like unhealthy environment, poverty and other unfriendly circumstances, they will always have conflicting Ego and it will direct their anger towards many social evils. They will become robbers, and abusers. Anger Management techniques will seldom work on them.

·         There is a huge responsibility on Parents and teachers to have an eagle eye on teens while giving them their required freedom to direct them towards positive activities, to motivate them to pursue their careers instead of demotivating and scolding them in order to lead them in right direction and to make them calm, enduring and peaceful in their personalities.   

·       Techniques to employ Anger management therapies in human lives;

There are several techniques and exercises which can be used to tame your anger and to direct it in a right direction. These tricks are helpful to bring peace and calmness in person`s life in order to make him healthy and to save him from regrets and bad health because spitting out words is easier, managing the after effects and the regrets it brings is much difficult.

According to William Arthur ward;

“It is wise to direct your anger towards problems - not people; to focus your energies on answers - not excuses.” 

 So, be Wise!! Given below are the best techniques of anger management

·         Trick No 1;

Always Be patient!! Think before saying any word to save yourself from blunders and regrets which you bring to yourself by hurting others. Take few seconds, calm the inner burst of energy and direct your anger in constructive way by providing strong points in your favor.

According to Ali Ibn Abi Talib;

“A moment of patience in a moment of anger prevents a thousand moments of regret.”

·         Trick No 2;

 

Talking to a trusted friend or person before reacting to situation in an aggressive way is a preferred way of dealing the situation. This will result in positive outcomes.

·         Trick No 3;

Writing a diary or journal and keeping these negative emotions in good faith of removing them out of heart and mind also proves to be helpful in dealing with anger and to keep yourself protected from regrets and loss of relationships.

·         Trick No 4;

 

Keeping a pet like dog or cat is quite beneficial in managing anger and this trick is proved by research that keeping pets can reduce your blood pressure level and can save you from many health issues.

 

·         Trick no 5;

 

Using Anger management therapies like humorous debates, reading motivational and self-development books and employing physical activities like breathing deeply, avoiding using drugs and alcohol can prove helpful in dealing with long term problem with anger management.

 Most Applicable Trick and In fact most Important:

·         Prophet Muhammad (P.B.U.H) the Greatest Law giver of World Hadith about Anger Management 1400 years back is most applicable:

Narated By AbuDharr : The Apostle of Allah (P.B.U.H) said to us:

 “When one of you becomes angry while standing, he should sit down. If the anger leaves him, well and good; otherwise he should lie down.”
Abu Dawud Book 036, Hadith Number 4764

 

Ø  So, employ these techniques and convert your anger into positive energy in order to save yourself and your relations and everyone around yourself!!

This world is dark. It needs light and positivity. So, do the best. Tame your evil anger within yourself and employ it in doing something best for yourself and your world.